George Hopkins

Below is an excerpt from a recent "Hopblog" entry. Mr. Hopkins is the Executive Director of The Cadets and has been for going on three decades. His work in the drum corps arena is legendary, as is his devotion to youth education and the pursuit of excellence. Anyone who has ever wondered why the Cadets work and succeed the way they do need look no further than Hop. He and the design team of the corps have constructed a standard of diligence and performance that few other organizations in the world can match on a consistent basis. His mentality is thus that of the corps, and one of the primary reasons why 1. I fell in love with The Cadets, 2. I auditioned there, and 3. I felt so at home once making the corps.

Now, I don't mean to pretend that I can draw comparisons between myself and Hop. He's devoted three decades of his life to impossible goals and formed one of the premier youth music groups in the nation. He's at a crossroads as he now attempts to determine the future path of the company he founded to back the Cadets and his own high school marching circuit, the USSBA. I'm a college student with some idea of the direction I want to take, an addiction to work/recognition, and a vague notion of how I want to find more to life than engineering. It's just that his blog remarks sometimes strike a chord with me, resonating with my own feelings in a way I can't seem to articulate myself.

So read below ...

"I have struggled letting people love me. I have come to realize something.

To me ... my perception ... I was loved because I had great grades.
I was loved because I never got in trouble.
I was loved because I went to college.
I never felt I was loved for me.

So ... of course, as I look at things now .... I am what I do. I take pride in my work, and when someone, anyone, shows interest in me past a certain point, I realize that I push back. I do not understand. I am uncomfortable.

I need to get past this point. I see it. I can intellectually see it ... now what? "

-George Hopkins, 2/3/2007


What do you think ... does this describe me?
And if so- what do I do?