Nerd Out

1998 was a good year for Christmas in our house. A fateful meeting with a legend of the DOS universe that summer had aided in my rapid ascension from a strictly console gamer to one of the joint console/PC variety. While this arrangement only further aggravated my already significant childhood obesity problem, it also opened an entire world of possibility to my pudgy little mouse-clicking fingers.

The DOS legend that unveiled these new and beautiful horizons to me was none other than the original Warcraft: Orcs and Humans. Although now an ancient tome of a previous age, it is a tome revered and heralded by all who have ever heard the heartwarming whistle of Orcish spears graze the air. Its influence since 1994 is perhaps only eclipsed by the halcyon memories of we who battled for the green fields of Azeroth. Even today, there are few sights in gaming that I find more terrifying than that of a Daemon sporting the impenetrable hell that is Unholy Armor. "Surely, the catapults will kill him!"

Fool.

Anyway, thus enraptured, my natural descent into the Blizzard Universe was as predictable as it was unstoppable. Christmas that year welcomed not only Warcraft II: Tides of Darkness into our home, but also the sweet nectar of the holiest gods that is Starcraft. I am not exaggerating when I say I logged more hours on Brood War than perhaps 98% of the other games I've played, combined. Months-long completion quests involving 120 stars and 230 missiles paled in comparison to the sacrifices I laid at the feet of the Overmind. Online matches, solo missions, map editing ... so many hours and days and weeks did I practice hydra-spamming and muta-ling builds.

I am simultaneously overjoyed and immensely saddened by the delay of Starcraft II to 2009. On the one hand, I eagerly await the chance to put the Juggernaught (my new quad processor PC) into action, once more driving through the Koprulu sector with the Fury of the Swarm at my back. On the other hand ... if the game were to be released before next summer, I almost guarantee I would be unable to finish my M.S. degree on my current timeline. The choice between interstellar conquest and stoichiometric mass balances is no choice at all, and money has little value to those who would call themselves Cerebrate.

In the meantime, I shall bide my time. There is little to be done but work to complete this degree so that I might enjoy the luxury of SCII in peace when it finally does arrive. That, and work on brainstorming my SCII call sign for online play. I was thinking perhaps "panamajackjose." It should be fitting, since rumor has it that the new Twilight Archon will have a mana-based attack known only as "Jueves." The command will drive all units in a certain radius into a chaotic bloodlust, satiable only through the grim death of their enemy.

In 2009, I submit my soul to the Will of the Khala. For now, back to work.

Happy Monday.